Hilarity ensues at Dave Barry's insanely funny discussion of "Insane City"

Where can you find retirees from New York who have lost their eyesight and hearing, but then get driver's licenses?

Well, Miami, of course!

Pulitzer Prize-winning humorist Dave Barry, whose syndicated column for The Miami Herald kept the nation hiccuping with laughter from 1983 to 2004, regaled a National Press Club audience with tales from the palm tree-lined beaches of "Insane City" at a sold-out Book and Author event Friday.

"Insane City," Barry's first solo adult novel in more than a decade is the tale of Seth Weinstein and his destination wedding in Florida.

But, as Barry has explained to non-Floridian for decades, nothing in South Florida is ever simple. Within hours of landing in the Sunshine State, Seth encounters rioters, Russian gangsters, angry strippers, a pimp as big as the Death Star, a very desperate Haitian refugee on the run with her two children from some very bad men, and an 11-foot albino Burmese python named Blossom.

What? No exploding cow?

The laughs began with former Press Club President Larry Lipman who recalled meeting Barry years ago at a Miami convention. Barry kindly offered him a ride in his Volkswagen Beetle. "It was stolen," Barry quipped.

Barry, who has written five young adult novels with his friend and fellow South Floridian author Ridley Pearson, two dark comedic suspense novels set in Miami called "Big Trouble" and "Risky Business," filled the hour with hilarious quips, quotes and jokes about everything from life in Miami to his recently retired rock band, "The Rock Bottom Remainders."

Among some of his hilarious observations about life in Miami:

*Most vehicular accidents occur when motorists drive into a building or a swimming pool;

*A man was arrested when he drove onto Runway 9 at Miami International Airport;

* Hurricane season runs from June through the following June.

As tradition dictates, National Press Club President Angela Greiling Keane closed the event by presenting the NPC mug to Barry, who accepted graciously.

"A mug. Thank God," Barry said. "I don't have any."